The Blessing of Failed Plans

It’s in the unlikely moments of our failed plans and shattered dreams that we see the broken pieces of our attempted success and deem ourselves broken. I think we sometimes accept our failed plans as an invitation to assume no good can possibly take their place. We only see the lingering bitterness of what we’re going through now and declare it unworthy, simply as if it’s a waste of time.

It wasn’t our plan, and this mess we’re living in looks isolating and depressing. I’m just going to say it: Some of the things we go through stink. We rightfully struggle to make any sense of it- it’s contrary to what we dreamed of.

I can think back to many times when I had a plan- the anxiety that overwhelmed my body when it wasn’t quite turning out how I thought it should. The panic stemmed from a place of frustration when things weren’t going how I deemed satisfactory. Those seasons were hard. I resented them in the moment simply because all I could see was the present moment. I couldn’t see the lessons I would later learn or the ways I would grow.

There are a few of these times that specifically stand out in my life:

There was the time I fully planned to go USF. It was safe, comfortable and 30 minutes from my family instead of 2 hours away. My plan failed.

I had to take statistics and macroeconomics to be considered for acceptance into the college I didn’t originally plan to attend but felt God leading me to. Didn’t God know I was bad at math?? I vaguely remember there being little time for me to get up from a desk scattered with graphs and eraser shavings other than to eat and sleep. I just wanted a relaxing summer with no hard math. My plan failed.

Then there’s the time I went off to college. I changed my desires, my comforts and discarded my feelings of security to go where I felt God leading me. I fully expected it to be good. That first semester was probably one of the hardest seasons I’ve ever had in my life. My plan failed.

We make many plans for ourselves. When those plans don’t turn out the way we think they should we feel upset, hurt and confused. It leaves us questioning the goodness of the season and how it serves a good purpose. We’re left questioning how the situation can be used for good if it doesn’t feel good right now.

We see the lonely feelings of isolation, the desperate cries of grief, the stabs of betrayal as we make every attempt to grab at the pieces of familiarity we think we can save- hoping there is a piece to cling to.

We beg for our plans to work, otherwise we wouldn’t make them. The plans wouldn’t become a fantasized imagination of our minds, and we wouldn’t make our best bets on them being accurate.

Why do we do this? Why do we find ourselves weighing the plans we make on small scale of success or failure and measuring our contentment with the season we’re in based on the results?

The answers to our frustrating questions can derive from a few things. We get frustrated because we only see what’s happening in the present moment instead of the future moments. We get frustrated because if it’s not our plan, we deem it failed… or broken. We get frustrated when our plans don’t work out because we see how it affected our control of our plans.

We crave success of our plans because we want control of them. We assume that if we can grasp that control, everything will fall into its rightful place. Everyone will be happy. No one leaves hurt. Most importantly, we don’t leave hurt.

I’ve found myself filtering these thoughts into my mind and buying into the satisfaction it suggests. The truth is, just because it’s in God’s plan doesn’t mean it’s going to be comfortable.

Actually, most of the time, the seasons where we don’t see our plan coming through for us are going to be hard. There will be seasons of grief and mourning. There will be seasons where we are trapped in physical and/or emotional isolation, and it’s because of a deadly virus spreading rapidly around the world none of us planned for.

God never promised OUR failed plans would be easy. But, He does promise HIS prevailing plans to be good.

My failed plan of going to USF in comfort turned to going to UF with boldness. Every person I meet and every opportunity reminds me of God’s goodness in leading me here. I wouldn’t be the person I am had I followed my own plan and gone where I was comfortable. My plans failed, but God didn’t.

My failed plan of avoiding the two subjects I thought impossible for me to succeed in turned to passing statistics with an A, passing macroeconomics with a B, and I got accepted into UF. It’s great to a Florida Gator! My plans failed, but God didn’t.

My failed assumption that the transition from home to Gainesville would be easy turned to a deeper reliance on God as my source of joy. He taught me the importance of surrender and trusting in His plan even when His plan didn’t feel trustworthy in the moment. But He is trustworthy. He is worth praising despite our circumstances and failed plans. THAT’S something you don’t learn when things are easy. My plans failed, but God didn’t.

You see, it’s the unlikely moments that I’ve seen the beautiful traces of God’s hands weaved into every hard moment of my past. Where we only feel our struggle to endure the present, God sees our strength to succeed in the future. He sees the whole puzzle when we only see a piece of it.

If only we could see how many times it is our plans that actually wreck us and His plans that always save us.

At a time when nothing is going as we planned, know that it’s in these moments God is making something beautiful out of them.

And, oh how beautiful those moments are when we look back and see what He was doing all along. He was teaching us, guiding us, building us, strengthening us and bringing us through the hard seasons to His promised good when we follow Him.

Anytime my plan is failing, His is prevailing. Praise the Lord for that!

It’s in the unlikely moments of our failed plans and shattered dreams that God takes every piece we believe to be broken and makes something new- He makes us new.